June 2011
1 post
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April 2010
6 posts
10 Excuses White people will get away with that...
Now if you watch TV as much as I do you must have seen the cases of Schools being shot up blah blah blah. Now when black people commit a crime its because, them or some one in the family come from Jamaica. However when white kids commit a crime its one of these things.
(10) My parents got a divorce.
(9) My parents were seperated.
(8) My parents always gave me what I wanted instead of paying...
Eating Out Tonight
1 more point for New Kingston, my friend Rene and I were scouting for places to eat and I suggested the new Restaurant that took the spot where the old Wendys used to be.
On knutsford Boulevard at the very bottom you will find SpringRoll Asian Fusion. The decor is very Manhattan, for those of us who have been there, the way my friend Rene describes it was “New York meets the Great...
The DNA Men, and there stories.....
Now we’ve heard the stories of the girls who do not know who there baby daddies are but what about the men involved in these scandals, my name is Lauren Alexander and today I’m going to tell the story of T Mcganger an artist getting major airtime on radio and tv, he is said to be the future of Hip Hop, talented and a great role model.
It was the end to a great performance and he...
What the Hell do you know, tell me
Awww boy, ever since I was a young girl and I started to like boys I was never impressed by the boys in the fast cars, or the boys with the gadgets, or even worst the boys who were always talking about what they have.
But sometimes I feel like society is no different from an airhead groupie, you all buy into the image, the look the and the diam facade. Half the people who you think rich are not...
Dear Reader............
I Received an email today from one of my male readers. Big Up all the men who read my columns, this is the email…….
Hello, i know you dont have a ph’d in psychology but your a woman and that’s enough. I have been going out with my girlfriend for over 4 1/2 years now, this april 16 will be 5 years. Since in first couple of years sex was great but then its like the tap...
what your boyfriend might let his friends do...
10 sure signs your Mr Right’s Friends may disrespect you, and the 10 sure signs he won’t do anything about it.
(10) On a car ride if your boyfriends the driver, his friends dnt mind sitting in the front with him. This happens all the time.
(9) If his friends are driving your boyfriend doesn’t sit in the back with you even if there are 4 persons in the car.
(8) His friends...
March 2010
23 posts
My Dog likes flowers
You live and you learn every day I learn something new. I’ve noticed for the past couple of weeks that my puppy likes flowers and nice lawns, whenever I walk him he stops and smells the flowers and tip toes on the lawn. i need to put a video up of him doing it its unusual.
Whats my point? My point is I’m amazed everyday at the things around me and the people in my life, when I think...
Please don't say anything
On Avril Lavignes first album, she has this song I don’t remember the name of the song but there is a verse in it that says: “I don’t wanna talk about it, I just wanna sit and stare at you”.
Men ever wonder why us women talk to each other for hours about nothing really sensible. Sometimes what we need is someone to listen and say “hush” we don’t need a...
Thought of Forever
Don’t worry your little head, nothing is forever not even death seems like it was just yesterday I heard a mad man say that, It’s Just today that i find myself wondering is he the one mad or me??
Those who can only see the world in one angle are considered ignorant, but those of us who see it in too many angles may be viewed as mad. Is it just me or is there no fucking balance in this...
Homosexual, Metro sexual whats the difference
Alright, excuse me if I think a guy who feels more comfortable in make up than I do not to mention the fact that he wears a perm! I love a manly man, the sexiest thing to me is when a guy can wear t shirt and jeans and he doesn’t need to look in the mirror because he’s worried that he may need to wax his chest hair again because according to him V Necks look hot on him, If I catch my...
A Tribute to Dancehall Queen Carlene
Now I have to pay tribute to this great woman, as I watch Rihanna’s Video rude bwoy for the hundredth time as I marvel at how outrageous Lady GaGa seems in her torn stockings and studded G-String. One Woman comes to mind, Jamaica’s own Dance Hall Queen Carlene she did it first and she did it in a time when women weren’t trying to take it off, she it and she flaunted her...
WAIT TILL YOUR FATHER GETS HOME,
I said this to my 3 month old puppy the other day, when I realised that he peed on the floor instead on the newspaper like he’s suppose to. Instantly I thought God how retarded, why would a woman say that to her child? why cant you scold him your self, why do you feel the need to give a man sooooo much power over a child you carried for 9 months? It’s ok for me to say that to a Dog...
Send me your videos now.
Send your Videos of you getting dressed to go to Club Privilege or while you’re there and you could win a VIP booth on us.
<object width=”400” height=”266” ><param name=”allowfullscreen” value=”true” /><param name=”allowscriptaccess” value=”always” /><param name=”movie”...
When the ugly ducklin becomes the fucking Swan.
Like a girl who was fat and did Lipo - Surgery I think I may be just a bit “bitter” but you know what they say about a woman scorned her fury is worst.
How would anyone feel if you’ve always had a special place in your heart for a specific person who acted like you never existed for years. Then one day they turn around after you’ve been tapping them on the shoulder for so...
I'm in Wonderland
Once again I’m ready to recall happy pages from my childhood as i find them scattered around my brain. When other girls played with barbies and washed their hair, I never played with mine, I would put them up as trophies idolizing my “Feminity” and burning the ones I didn’t like.
I loads of books, I hated the books that came with pictures because I didn’t give my...
Lady Gaga, "Telephone" ft Beyonce
First let me start by saying I love this video!! Let me continue by saying it has nothing to do with the song, but a continuation from her video “Paparazzi” where she killed her boyfriend.
The video can be interpreted in two ways, they can be lovers who have very controlling boyfriends who don’t appreciate them so they poison them using one of me’ns many weaknesses food....
Who really cares about Dudus??
Now my turn to comment on this Dudus issue, this is what I think yes once again America is showing us that they are a super country and we must shut up and do as we’re told. However with so many things happening in the world, The king of pop dies, that girl from clueless died, that dude from broke back mountain is dead, Rex Nettleford finally kick the bucket, like seriously who gives a fuck...
Girls without Voices
I’m sitting in a printing shop waiting to be served there’s a girl beside me playing with her fingernails waiting patiently to be served, the attendant is chatting on the phone. Now I get up and ask what is going on, why should sit down and wait while you finish your conversation I’m a costumer, who is spending my hard earned money I dont deserve some respect.
I hate women who...
Night Life in Jamaica
You can get a glimpse when you watch Rihanna video for “Rude Bwoy” heavily influenced by Jamaica and Dancehall that our culture as it relates to partying and the influence of music is no joke. Every and any day of the week depending on your preference we party hard in Jamaica, we might not be no Ibiza but give us a couple millions and we’ll put the finishing touches on it and...
February 2010
18 posts
You Know best.
Nobody can really tell you what to do, i mean in a perfect world not really. Except maybe the police, President, your boss, your mom, OK so a few people can tell you what to do but not alot. My point is when you ask people for advise what you’re really asking for, (at least I hope that’s what you’re doing) is just voicing your opinions for a free life is voicing what’s...
You Know best.
10 Things Most Black men DO NOT know
Believe or not I had another argument with a dam African and it came to my knowledge that there are a lot of things Black Men dont have a clue about so I made a list!! enjoy.
10 things most Black Men don’t know. (1) That white women wear weave. (2) That latino women wear weave. (3) That it doesn’t matter what race a woman is, weave is a personal choice not a racial issue. (4)...
A conversation between fools.
Fool: What do you think came first the chicken or the egg.
Another fool: I'm sure the egg came first.
Fool: are you sure you need the chicken to make the egg.
Another fool: but you need an egg to bring the chicken that will produce the egg.
Fool: yes you idiot but you need a chicken to produce the egg that will produce the chicken to produce the other dam egg!
Another fool: I don't see what you're getting at.
Fool: I don't see your point to be quite honest.
While the two simple fools argued, the house was on fire because somebody was frying an egg and left it unattended. The tale of two fools, its happened to all of us.
10 Relationship rules.
10 very important rules you must obtain for a relationship to work. (1) The first three months of your relationship should be almost like a secret being hidden from the tabloids. It should be a need to know basis don’t go blubbering to Mellisa about where he brought you on your first date and how expensive the food was. (2) Do not ask your friend for advise! Do not ask your friends for...
Don't allow him to move you in,
I grew up on a farm my mom and dad were very poor they had 10 children I was the 10th, hahahahahaha not really I just always wanted to say that ahahahaha. Now let’s go on to another topic which most women find tricky. I’m 23 years old and I have never lived with a man, yes it could be that I’m annoying, problematic and just too dam loud. It could also be that I’m unwilling...
Children Aren't Toys
Its still Relationship week here on LaurenOLauren, and I wanted to point out that some of the best relationships don’t need children! yes I said it a lot of girls, and i’ll say the word Girls think having a baby is great and it probably is when you think about it, but contrary to what you may believe they are not toys or trends that come in and out with the time, they’re fat and...
Thank you, for being a jerk
It’s the month of February and even though it’s Black history month, something i honestly think white people invented to remind us that we were once in slavery and that they still have the upper hand. I thought why not have an “Ode to Relationships” week so all of this week i will posting blogs dedicated to the relationships that work and don’t work, and if you have...
i in love
i love cookie.xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Hush little baby,
When i like probably 5, maybe younger im not too sure right now, my older sister used to sing that nursery rhyme, “hush little baby don’t say a word” everybody knows it and it goes on into saying if the mocking bird don’t sing, mama is gonna buy you a diamond ring, blah blah blah. Yeah well, i used to believe every word of that song, and since she only sang it to me when i...
January 2010
4 posts
Those who dig..........
Those who dig also hide, after a whole day of digging they’ll go back to their closet and hide more treasures. The world is sooo off balance that if you look at first nothing makes sense, but looking even closer it all adds up, Therapist always have more issues than their patients, most doctors have a drinking problems, and the fathers who are over protective of their daughters always date...
How do I sound?
More and more the little things in life really starts to matter, maybe its cause we’re all getting old. The things that used to make you jump doesnt make you jump any more because you expect it to happen, you find yourself asking where is the fucking suspense??
If you are anything like me, you ask yourself more times than you should what the fuck am I doing wrong?? Nothing goes according to...